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Post by wearefree on Dec 8, 2008 22:01:28 GMT 1
I'll just add once again that it's a relief to allow myself to act from my true self rather than the 'role' which I have lived for so long. My true self never really enjoyed 'the role' too much!
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Post by Martin Brofman on Dec 10, 2008 9:36:21 GMT 1
You're doing great!
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Post by wearefree on Jan 7, 2009 16:43:10 GMT 1
At the moment I have found it useful to kind of say yes to myself whatever I feel like thinking or doing, it's relaxing. One of the things that is halting my progress though is a fear of what someone is going to think if I make the changes that are in accord with my genuine desires (this is someone I live with, who in my opinion is only ok with a certain version of myself - a version that is not the full expression of myself). It might make some sense to know that I do not really like this person(they are not family either), and so I sense that were I to be myself he might realise I don't like him. Do you have any advice, should I just follow through and continue my progression towards the new me, understanding that it means accepting the idea that I don't like the person I live with (which at the moment feels like a barrier).
I know the way for me to feel better is to just completely express what I want to do(both internally and outwardly), but everytime I do this, there seems to be a barrier I can sense/feel and I know it's related to my fear of whether the person I live with will accept me. Should I perhaps ignore this fear? I can also consider that it's my freedom to have my own opinions and that I shouldn't let others control my way of being(even if they don't like it).
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Post by Martin Brofman on Jan 7, 2009 18:18:19 GMT 1
I would recommend being fully yourself, and let the chips fall where they may.
Worse case scenario is that you will no longer live together, and that can mean that you will have your own place where you feel totally free, or else be with someone who appreciates the real you, so in fact, it could be the best for all.
Step through the self-imposed barriers, and trust your trip.
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Post by wearefree on Jan 9, 2009 3:35:24 GMT 1
Thanks for your words Martin they have helped me a great deal.
Today something happened for the first time. Just momentarily(no more than a few seconds) I felt so much more embodied than before. There was a sense of presence in me and the past suddenly felt like it had happened but that I wasn't really there during it. The emotion of this moment was also quite strong, much more than I'm used to in my everyday life. It suddenly felt ok to be me as well.
I think this is a good occurence, what do you think?
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Post by Martin Brofman on Jan 9, 2009 7:25:28 GMT 1
It's the real you. Get used to it.
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Post by wearefree on Jan 11, 2009 21:07:32 GMT 1
Thanks Martin, I really want to reach this state of being as frequent as possible. When I reach it I suddenly feel responsible and confident in who I am. It's a state where I have complete trust and courage in myself.
So I am willing now to be myself, forget any old role I used to play and move towards this new vibration, letting things in accord with the old vibration just fall away - I don't need them anymore.
I have the courage and belief to be free and to be myself, and I want to attract people who share my sense of freedom.
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Post by Martin Brofman on Jan 12, 2009 7:38:40 GMT 1
You are now attracting people who share your sense of freedom.
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Post by wearefree on Jan 14, 2009 4:35:06 GMT 1
Thanks Martin,
I feel a bit like a different person(not quite all there yet) but certainly my perspective on life is changing. Where I once was resigned to the future, I now feel that there are possibilities to explore, people to meet, experiences to be had etc..What has amazed me is my new found eagerness to meet people I like, to befriend others who are like me - who want to have fun in life. I feel eager to meet people and make friends, perhaps for the first time in life.
I used to be a little closed off from people and prefer not to socialise, but now I sense that socialising and meeting like minded people and having fun is one of the most important things in this world.
I sense this is a very welcome change.
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Post by Martin Brofman on Jan 14, 2009 6:59:26 GMT 1
Very welcome, indeed. Sounds like you are on the right path.
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Post by wearefree on Jan 18, 2009 18:12:37 GMT 1
Martin,
I'm beginning to realise the extent to which fear has governed decisions in my life - and there is a lot of it! I realise that for me to return to clarity means being genuine and not making the 'fear based' reactive choice, but instead fully believing in myself, trusting in my genuine wants and honouring them.
Interestingly, when I consider what my intuition guides me to do, I realise that it is trying to lead me away from situations where I am reacting through fear.
So, I suppose I am very much clearer in my perspectives now, it is a welcome change. I realise how important it really is to trust ourselves.
Thanks.
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Post by wearefree on Jan 29, 2009 18:04:59 GMT 1
Quick update:
Very suprised at how 'bright' the world is. Can see much better, outside really well, although I tend to tense up when outdoors, possibly in response to so many people 'looking at me?'
On another note, an experience that has gotten stronger and stronger is the sense that the past happened...but that I was not 'present' to experience and enjoy it. Maybe this is just because I am expressing myself more and more (to myself) and realising that in the past I was 'hiding' to a great extent.
Anyway, the eyesight isn't completely fine yet but I do tend to focus too much perhaps on 'what is wrong' - particularly the root chakra issues - of living with someone I do not particularly like and studying a subject I am not particularly enthralled by.
But I suppose it's a question of not dwelling on these issues so much, just accepting the way I feel about them, and then placing my attention elsewhere - maybe on other pursuits I do like?
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Post by Martin Brofman on Feb 3, 2009 7:47:44 GMT 1
Do what you really want to do, do not do what you really do not want to do, and trust your trip.
You are aware of what you are not happy with - and now you can do something about it, rather than choosing to not see it.
...and the truth shall set you free.
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Post by wearefree on Feb 23, 2009 15:42:03 GMT 1
Thanks Martin,
Today I had slight discomfort on the sides of my head, about an inch above my ears. It only lasted for half a minute maximum, do you know what it means?
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Post by Martin Brofman on Feb 23, 2009 17:06:03 GMT 1
Some tension at that time in the brow chakra. Look at what was happening then, and what you were thinking and feeling at the time.
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